Your Man
I have a question for you ladies out there! How do you all prepare for your husbands arrival at home? I know that there have been many times Chad has come home without calling me first (how dare he!) and I am shocked when he comes home because I haven't "prepared" for his arrival. He says that he doesn't care at all when he comes home and the house is absolutely, well...just plain old trashed. Ha! I know that I don't like to come home to a messy home, so I try and give him a nice greeting from us and from the home when he arrives. I ask him to call because it really makes me happy to bless him and to let him come home to a comfortable home. With small children and every day life it's very hard to keep your house always welcoming and sane, so a phone call helps out tremendously.
I try to do the following:
I try to do the following:
- have a full glass of his favorite drink ready (dinner being ready is sometimes out of the question for me)
- the toys picked up
- the children's diapers changed
- a decent outfit on (not my pj's -- even if that means changing out of them 30 mins before he comes home!)
- make up on or at least something that doesn't resemble a morning face! (I love Laurie's story on that one!)
The children and I make a game out of it called "getting ready for daddy" and they love it. Not only are they being taught to pick up their toys but they are so excited as they get ready to see their daddy. This teaches them how to be respectful and submissive to their mommy's and daddy's.
These are the things that I can do (although little) that I know will reduce stress for him when he comes home.
What about you all?
posted by Beth Young at
10:28 AM
7 Comments:
I'm so challenged by all you do to prepare for Chad's arrival. I don't think it would occur to me at all to do anything but say, "tag, you're it" apart from wonderful counsel and input from friends like Laurie, in particular, but Carole Eberwein among others. And, now your example gets added to the list.
I do try to do some of the same things; although all the toys picked up just isn't going to happen. We clear a path to make sure he can get in the door and to the kitchen.
I do try to have dinner or some sort of snack for him b/c he's normally starved, or I'll call and ask him to eat the snack I put for him in his lunch.
I try to be dressed w/ makeup on, too, which I think does mean something to my hubby. It doesn't matter to some husbands, but mine isn't one of them.
And, one of the "funnest" things I do is to use an excited voice to tell the boys, "Look who's home. Papi's home!!! Yeah!!" And, I make them greet him at the door w/ hugs and kisses and I try to be sure to give him a hug and kiss, too...this can be especially tricky if I've had a really hard day or if we've managed to get into an argument over the phone on his way home.
Can't say I do any of this perfectly; it's just what I aim for everyday. :)
Oh, I almost forgot one of the biggest ones: Don't be on the phone. I learned early on that being distracted on the phone or talking w/ a neighbor when he arrives home is something that really makes him feel disrespected. SO, I really try to not be on the phone especially.
notice I said that I "try"....and I do try it just doesn't always happen. Like tonight for instance. He walks in from the rain with the front door locked and me sipping a cold drink with no dinner or anything for him. I'm too busy blogging about it, I guess!
Let's see . . . my husband often has dinner on the table, sometimes the lawn cut, and a big hug waiting for me when I get home. Oh . . . wait . . .you were asking what I do for my husband!
No, no, my husband's not a stay-at-home dad, but he does get home 2-3 hours before me!
Anyway, the time will come when that's changed around, and I hope you all will remember to ask me what I'm doing for my hubby. In the meantime, you all are GREAT examples! Thanks for that and all the ideas!
I just thought of something. One thing we do is I call Josh as soon as I get out of work and we chat about the day. That way, by the time I get home, we don't have to catch up. We love our phone chats!
Fry up onions! That's what my mom used to do when she knew Daddy would be walking in the door hungry and she hadn't realized how late it was. She might not have known what she was putting WITH the onions, but he was convinced dinner was started. This from a father who never complained about anything, even frozen pizza, and gushed about macaroni and cheese. I've tried to keep onions ready to fry up in a pinch!
My hubby loves a clean home, so the smell of Lysol or floor cleaner lifts his spirits. (Never mind fancy perfume or make-up!) He appreciates having the mail on the counter, time to unwind and work out, fresh brewed iced tea in the fridge, and (although he wouldn't admit it) a listening ear when he's had a tough day. (And for 2 years straight, that's been every day.) And no one on the phone.
I also have tried to train the kids not to dump on Dad the problems of the day till his stomach's full. Problems aren't fixed by announcing them upon Dad's arrival, and he can cope better after dinner. We aren't 100% on any of these attempts to make Paul's homecoming pleasant, but like ya'll, we try. On the rare occasions he beats me home, I find myself thinking, "Yeh, when I get home,I hope the house is neat and dinner's ready or almost ready." And I'm convicted to show him the same kindness since this is his life routine!
This was a challenging post and a great reminder! I admit that I'm not great about preparing for my husband's arrival. Although, I have been trying to have dinner cooking.
One thing I do do is try to keep myself from "unloading" everything from my day on him when he first walks in the door. I've learned that I need to give him time to come home, relax, and ask, "So, what'd you do today?"
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